tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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