It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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