He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
