By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
