chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
the liver wants what the liver wants
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
