You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
