You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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