who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
