So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
we're making bets on your personal life
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
