After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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