covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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