ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
