I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
