We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
