So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
