I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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