I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
