She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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