just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
