i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
