Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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