ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
