So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize