508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
