just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
