I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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