Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
