I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
