I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
