i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
