D3 body, D1 cock
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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