At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
