i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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