They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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