You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I smell like Dick and happiness
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
