he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize