Say something about gay babies.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize