I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
