I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
