Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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