We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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