It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Randomize
