I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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