is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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