blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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