when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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