An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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