Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize