Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
