i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
