I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
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